How to Plan A Family Reunion

I'm in charge of two family reunions this year. I come from a family of nine kids (this is what we looked like in 2011).

And so does my husband (this is what we looked like at Christmas 2012)!

So, as you can see, our reunions are LARGE when everyone can attend. And I'm in charge of both this year. And I'm not freaking out. It's true, I haven't developed a single twitch or bout of insomnia. Because I have this great family reunion pattern that I've honed over the years. People keep asking me about my family reunion pattern (and are surprised at the lack of crazy), so I thought I'd share it here.

I'm not going to give you a complete worksheet for family reunion planning. But I will lay out some of the decisions that have made our family reunions easier on The Organizer (and the wallet).

LAY OUT A SCHEDULE
I lay out the day(s) and the meals like this:

Monday
8am Breakfast
12pm Lunch
5 pm Dinner

Then add the snack times (you must have snacks!):
Monday
8am Breakfast
10am Snack
12pm Lunch
2pm Snack
5 pm Dinner
7pm Snack

Then add the activities (just a time slot right now):
Monday
8am Breakfast
10am Snack and Morning Activity
12pm Lunch
2pm Snack and Afternoon Activity
5 pm Dinner
7pm Campfire (or Evening Gathering, whatever you want to call it)
7pm Snack (S'Mores for us, if it's a Campfire)

This is the first part of the pattern. I use it every year and it's been a good balance between free time and scheduled time.

CHOOSE A THEME
Now choose a theme. Why a theme? Because a theme adds the framework for the event. Everything ties together in a cohesive whole, when you have a theme. If you need ideas, go to Pinterest. This is the board I created for our Olympic-themed reunion. This is another board where I collected Camping ideas. With Pinterest boards, your vision for the reunion can be easily shared with everyone else. You want fun crafts and games and recipes that go along with the theme? Your board collects the ideas for everyone to see.

HOW MANY COMING?
You need to know how many people are coming to the reunion in order to start the next ball rolling.  Once you know your numbers, then you can figure out how many meals/snacks each family needs to be responsible for. This year, each family needs to be responsible for one meal and one snack, for 54 people. Yes, that's a lot of people. Yes, that's a lot of food. But we only have to make ONE meal (our reunion is three nights and four days long) the entire time, and the rest we are sitting around enjoying ourselves.

FOOD PREP
Let's take a moment and talk about food and its preparation. I've been to family reunions where The Organizer is in charge of menu planning and buying food for the entire reunion (plus all the activities). Typically, people help out with the prep and cleanup. But this sort of set-up is why people burn out when organizing reunions! There is another way to organize the food of a large group.

My pattern has each family plan a meal, buy the food, prep the food, and clean up the food (they don't have to serve it because we always lay it out buffet style). This pattern has SO MANY benefits. Families on smaller budgets can choose to make inexpensive meals (like pancakes for breakfast, an inexpensive meal that can feed a lot of people). Families that make elaborate meals can also do the extensive cleanup those kind of meals take (one year we had the rule that families who cooked didn't have to clean their own cooking, and that was a disaster--it's much better to have you clean up what you cook (makes for cleaner cooks!)). The only con with this food prep pattern is that families with allergies must bring backup food since other families are making the food. But families with allergies are used to that (aren't we?). One caveat, if it's a nut allergy, which is life threatening, then everyone in the family needs to accommodate that allergy. But if it's gluten or diary etc, then families just need to bring extra food for their child.

DELEGATE
Now it's time to delegate. I email out a note to everyone in the family, and it reads like the one below. Some things I want to point out:

1. You will notice it's very enthusiastic and cheery. Yep, that's how my reunion note sounds. If you want enthusiasm you must project enthusiasm. And reunions deserve excitement!):
2. I assign people by name to be in charge of the different activities. I make sure I have an assignment for one member of each family. This shares the responsibility (delegate!) and makes everyone feel like they're part of the reunion. Everyone needs to feel needed.
3. The "campfires" or evening activities are always themed the same: Talent Show, Game Night, and Family Story night. These are great for all ages, they always include a snack (s'mores if it's around the campfire) and they make for GREAT family video (especially the Talent Show). Every family is required to provide 1-2 talents for Talent Show night and a family story for Family Story Night. The stories can get "boring" for the littles, so we make sure they have something to do during the stories (like cook marshmallows).

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"It's Family Reunion Time. Yay!!

The theme for this year is Family Olympics: Go For The Gold. Below is the list of meals.

Everyone needs to choose one meal and one snack. First ones to email me get their reserved spot! Keep in mind that we are feeding 54 people this year. Remember, you only have to prep, cook, and clean ONE meal (and a snack) the whole reunion. The rest of the time you can relax and enjoy the time together. I need some people in charge of these activities:
Olympics: ____ will you head this up?
Crafts: _____ will you head this up?
Talent Show Night:  _____ will you head this up?
Family Story Night: _____ will you head this up?
Game Night: _____ will you head this up?

Thank you for your help!
Here is the tentative schedule. Remember to email me back ASAP to reserve your meal and snack:
Monday
8am Breakfast
10am Snack
10am Olympics- led by ______
12pm Lunch
2pm Snack
2pm Crafts- led by ______
5 pm Dinner
7pm Talent Show Night- led by ________
7pm Snack

I am so excited to see all of you! Cabin information will be coming soon.
Love,
~Valerie"
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LOCATION
If you're not doing an overnighter, your reunion will be immensely easier to plan. But I think there's something special about sleeping over, and since moving a large group the same direction takes 15-30 minutes (at least!), sleeping over decreases that lag. But where to hold your reunion?

A Large Home: A very large house with a room for each family has worked well for us. Above is the house we used in 2011 in the Utah mountains (warning, it snowed even though it was June, but thus are memories made!). Babies can take naps behind a closed door without parents being away from the excitement. Introverts have a place of refuge if needed. All the relatives get plenty of together time. The cons of the arrangement is definitely cost--it's expensive. And it can be hard to find a place for all the food and gear of so may people.

If you choose this Large House option, I highly recommend a swimming pool. It's a great activity for all ages and you don't have to leave the grounds. The large home I want us to stay in next year has this pool (Yeah!!):

Tent Camping: We tried this for the first time this year (yes, the first reunion I'm in charge of this year happened last week, I have till August for the second). It was a bit of a disaster (should I admit that, considering you're coming here for reunion advice?). Setting aside the debate from relatives who want flush toilets not porta potties, we had some unforeseen difficulties.

Those dark clouds heralded a TORNADO WATCH, southern Idaho

The first night we had winds so strong that they broke the poles on one tent and bent the poles on another (my husband collapsed our tent, at midnight, when we could feel the winds were very heavy, and so we spent a sleepless night trying to keep our sleeping bag and pillows from flying away). The second night we had a Tornado Watch with lightning. By 11pm the sky had cleared and we were able to sleep out in the open (better than the night before!) but earlier in the evening we had to pack up all our gear ready to evacuate if needed (it was very dramatic). Tent camping with a huge group is for the very brave. The other concern was cooking. We camped near a pavilion with a fridge and stove (yay!) and a very large fire pit. If we had tent camped on a mountain, our original plan, we would have had to feed everyone off food cooked on a tiny campstove. We probably would've broken down and bought a big propane stove for the reunion, but since we camped near civilization, we didn't have to. We also changed our plan from mountaintop camping to civilization camping because we could see that the area would have a fire ban. What is camping without a fire? Nothing! It is nothing without a fire. A fire is vital. So we changed venue.

SCOUT CAMPS

Here's my family in 2009 at a scout camp Reunion. 

My side of the family uses a scout camp for the reunion every year. This year we changed to a Cub Scout camp, but the general set up is the same: individual cabins, commercial kitchen, stage near a fire pit, a large body of water next to camp, AND flush toilets!! This new camp has flush toilets inside the cabins, which is new. The camp we've been using for a decade only has communal bathrooms, so we're moving up in the world this year. But flush toilets are always available in both scout camps, and that appeases the relatives who really really care! Scout camps add up to a fabulous location for a large amount of people. Even with 54 people, each family will have their own cabin--which will help with those napping babies and introverts. The commercial kitchen makes feeding a crowd easier and the water means swimming, canoeing and water skiing (my Dad always brings his boat).

ACTIVITIES
Wherever you plan your reunion, you can make your own fun on site. But if you're in Idaho or Utah, those states really have family friendly fun. This year we had our Harmon reunion in Idaho. We spent a day at Stedman's Water Slide and Farm (with two 500' waterslides and zipline. Wow!),

 The last day in Idaho, we headed to my mother-in-law's reunion with her siblings and extended family at Harris Pond and Zipline (3 acre pond, paddle boats, huge zip line, fountain, and pirates (although I do not guarantee your reunion will have pirates throwing you in or trying to swamp your boat, they may only exist in my family)).

Family is the most important thing to me, so making time and money in our schedule and budget for a reunion rates pretty high. I value the relationships I formed with my siblings and cousins, and see my children doing the same. Some people might recoil in horror when I say that our vacation time is all taken up with family reunions. Of course I can think of more romantic ways to spend a vacation, or more exotic ways. But you can't beat the thrills of a reunion (did you see those zip lines?) or most of all, the swelling of love you feel as you look around the campfire at all the smiling sticky faces roasting marshmallows and laughing together. It's worth it!